Part 2: Transition
After I left Terrific Company, I started a new job with a non-profit that primarily did government research. Lots of social science research and they were looking to get into clinical trials work, primarily epidemiology. I had been involved with the business of clinical trials before (precisely, the software that did the analysis for clinical trials). I had a friend who had gone to this company and we'd been talking. I had other friends at the company, too. I thought it would be great. This company ("Research Company") had a mission that inspired me.
Too bad I can't remember it now. It had something to do about helping people and improving the human condition.
It was a disaster. Research Company had no work for me. When they did have a little bit of work, I was supposed to do a lot of it "on my own time" because that's one way they kept the cost of their contracts down. They tossed me new-grad level computer programming work, when I expected to do million-dollar project management. When they did give me a project to manage, they hated my realistic project plan. I was stressed out because I had no direction with intense pressure to bring in money for the company. I remember asking at one point, "Am I missing something? Am I supposed to be finding my own work within the company, and I don't know it?" My friends at the company were too busy with their jobs to mentor me or help me find my way.
One of my friends I had in the company was a man I knew from church. He was just a dude in nice suits to me, but he was actually a "C" level executive with the company. I had his ear. During the whole time, though, I think he was just trying to get me into the sack. He probably helped me get the job. I did realize at the time that he wanted to bed me; I planned to use that position for all it was worth. Without actually having sex...I was married and had no inclination to ruin my marriage for this Bozo.
I'm married to a really good guy.
Also in retrospect, during these months, I was very, very angry. Professionally, I felt so betrayed by Terrific Company and the software industry. I felt so powerful and clever and smart. It burned me up that no one could recognize what a great employee I was. Why didn't anyone want to keep me at this company? Why didn't I get attention and support??? I know I talked way too much and said way too many things to too many people that probably hurt my image and my career.
I had also grown accustomed to the "entrepreneurial" model for business - small, agile, energetic, fast. A government research company is the exact opposite of all of these qualities - despite the lip service they gave to these trendy ideas (in 2002).
I needed to be selfish for a while, and not ally myself with any company. I was not ready to commit again. I went solo. I left 7 months after starting and went into independent contracting. Guess who my first contract was with?
Yep. Terrific Company.
It was a totally different group (in fact, with people I knew back when I first started at Terrific Company 10 years earlier). It was a totally different area - document management. I contracted with them for about a 14 months. During this time, I did the work that eventually became my (our) patent.
Ironically, as a contractor I made more money than when I worked for Terrific Company, and I had my private office back.
Also during this time, the seeds of the nursing career were planted and began to grow.
Coming next: Part 3: Paradigm Shift
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