The Poker Group

I belong to a poker group. Nothing formal, we get together about every 2 weeks at someone's house and play Texas Hold 'Em, no limit tournament style. A little bit of money is involved. I have learned how to play reasonably well, which makes it that much more fun. Some days the cards go in my favor, some times they don't. Often I get mediocre cards, and the trick is all in how I play them. Much like life.

I think about poker and the differences in how women and men play. As you might guess, as a female, I am in the minority - I'm usually not alone, but last night was pretty typical - 4 men, 2 women. It was an average night of play for me; I was out early in the first game, but took second place in the second game. Taking home some money satisfies me. As long as I play fairly well and get a few good hands, I am happy. Of course I prefer to win, but it's not like the men. They really like to win.

Men like to bluff in a poker game. They like to get the better of someone by bullshitting them, achieving this seems to be a badge of honor. As I thought a bit, I saw similarities in the poker bluff and to men go about pursuing women when dating - they try to bluff their way into seeming just a little bit richer, more clever, luckier, more glib, more socially connected, etc. than they really are. That's all in the game. If the poker bluff fails, they still get admiration from their peers - that was a ballsy move.

I generally don't bluff. Every once in a while I try it and occasionally it works. Sometimes my bluff starts out legitimate, and it falls apart when the flop, turn, and river are revealed. Usually I stop my losses when I see my chances slip away, I'm such a wimp!

Experience has helped. I know what a good hand is and I pretty much know how to bet it. I could learn more about pot odds, reading other players' actions better, modifying my behavior to play the cards I have better. Practice and a little research would help; in fact, I read most of Phil Hellmuth's book on Texas Hold 'Em and it improved my game significantly. It gave me a different way of thinking about the game and the players.

I doubt I'd ever make any real money playing poker. It's fun. It's social. And most importantly, it's something my spouse and I do together. Very valuable.